i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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