:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
