he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
