You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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