ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
