we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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