yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
