are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
