I didn't shave. On purpose
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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