Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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