i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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