So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
