Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
