she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
