where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
