____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
