I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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