i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
