Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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