It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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