he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
