you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
