meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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