OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
