you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Randomize
