When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Just high enough for therapy.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Randomize
