I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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