I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
