East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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