I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
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