I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
