i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
