i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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