Quick, to the slutcave!
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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