I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
