Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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