I got chris browned last night
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
