8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
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