Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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