i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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