I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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