Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
