I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
