Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
