So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
