You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
