Are we in a gay sports bar?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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