their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
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