My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Randomize
