Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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